Kenz: Come here, Mimi. I have to tell you something.
Auntie Steph: Secrets don't make friends.
Kenz: It's not a secret. It's a special word.
Kenz leads Mimi into her bedroom. She locks the door and slams it shut with Mimi on the inside. Then comes and sits with Auntie Steph at the table.
Kenz: I tricked her.
Shit My Niece Says
Straight from a 3-year-old's mouth. Anddd now she's five.
I've wanted to start blogging for quite some time now. But I needed some inspiration. And I finally found it: My 3-year-old niece, MacKenzie. The sh!t that comes out of her mouth is unreal. She is smart, witty, upfront, and for real. Unlike anyone I know. And one of my favorite people in the world. I am entertained by her everyday. Now it's your turn.
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
Friday, January 4, 2013
Friday, December 21, 2012
No One Saw, Mim.
Lu packs a Kit-Kat in Kenzie's lunchbox. Kenz comes home from school.
Kenz: MOM! I'm not allowed to bring candy to school.
Lu: So what did you do with your Kit Kat?
Kenz: I just ate it when no one was looking.
Kenz: MOM! I'm not allowed to bring candy to school.
Lu: So what did you do with your Kit Kat?
Kenz: I just ate it when no one was looking.
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Monday, August 8, 2011
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Auntie Steph: She's a Big Girl
Lauren: Steph called and said she's going to the farmer's market now, so if you want to go, you better hurry up.
Mimi: What?! I'm not ready yet. I haven't even brushed my teeth.
Kenz: Mim, it's okay. You don't have to go if you don't want to. Auntie Steph is a big girl and she can go by herself.
Mimi: What?! I'm not ready yet. I haven't even brushed my teeth.
Kenz: Mim, it's okay. You don't have to go if you don't want to. Auntie Steph is a big girl and she can go by herself.
Friday, July 22, 2011
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Monday, July 18, 2011
You Look Fat in Those Pants
Mimi: It's time to get out of the bathtub. I'm getting dressed and we're going to the car wash.
Kenz: Well I'm not getting out of the tub until you ARE dressed.
[Mimi gets dressed]
Kenz: Mimi, you look fat in those pants.
Mimi: Really? Daddy says I don't look fat.
Kenz: Hmm. Do you have attitude?
Mimi: Major attitude now that you said I look fat in these pants.
Kenz: Well. You still do.
Kenz: Well I'm not getting out of the tub until you ARE dressed.
[Mimi gets dressed]
Kenz: Mimi, you look fat in those pants.
Mimi: Really? Daddy says I don't look fat.
Kenz: Hmm. Do you have attitude?
Mimi: Major attitude now that you said I look fat in these pants.
Kenz: Well. You still do.
Friday, July 15, 2011
Thursday, July 14, 2011
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Your WHAT?!
[Lauren's jeans are too tight]
Lauren: Look at this, Steph.
Steph: Welcome to my life.
Kenz: Welcome to my hell.
Lauren: Look at this, Steph.
Steph: Welcome to my life.
Kenz: Welcome to my hell.
Monday, July 11, 2011
You're Welcome
Mimi: If you get the least bit crazy, you're going to bed.
Kenz: NO! You are!
Mimi: I'd be happy to, thank you.
Kenz: You're welcome.
Kenz: NO! You are!
Mimi: I'd be happy to, thank you.
Kenz: You're welcome.
Saturday, July 9, 2011
Friday, July 8, 2011
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Shopping for Soda
Mimi: Kenz, what kind of soda do you want for the party?
Kenz: Grape for me, orange for Jack.
Kenz: Perfect! Grape for me and orange for Jack and gingerale for Mimi and Mama and everyone else can drink water.
Kenz: Grape for me, orange for Jack.
Kenz: Perfect! Grape for me and orange for Jack and gingerale for Mimi and Mama and everyone else can drink water.
Dad Breaks the Lamp
Kenz and Dad, jumping on the bed. Cue crash.
Mimi: What happened?
Kenz: It's not my fault, it's not my fault.
Mimi: I know it's not your fault. It's okay.
Kenz: [pointing finger at Dad] Mark, I'm so pissed that you broke the fucking lamp.
Mimi: What happened?
Kenz: It's not my fault, it's not my fault.
Mimi: I know it's not your fault. It's okay.
Kenz: [pointing finger at Dad] Mark, I'm so pissed that you broke the fucking lamp.
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